The leaked Signal conversation among cabinet members reveals a serious discussion about the U.S.’s relationship with Israel, with some members suggesting a more strategic approach and others proposing that Israel should contribute more for U.S. support. There were also brief interjections about lighter topics such as lunch menus.
Waltz (8:04 am ET): Team, the current situation with Israel is becoming increasingly dire. Any ideas on how to maintain our ‘special relations’ without compromising our positions?
Hegseth (8:10 am ET): We keep ’em close, Mike, 😎 just like Don keeps his Diet Cokes. Cold, fizzy and always on hand 🥤.
Vance (8:20 am ET): Pete, this isn’t about beverages. Israel is a significant U.S. ally. The economic, political and security implications of this relationship should not be taken lightly. We need a strategic approach.
Miller (8:35 am ET): Who’s up for making Israel pay a little more for our support? Europe’s been mooching off us for too long too. Let’s set some boundaries.
Gabbard (8:40 am ET): I concur, Stephen. Also, can we have borscht for lunch? 🍲
Rubio (8:50 am ET): Tulsi, we’re dealing with a potential shift in international diplomacy, not lunch menus.
Wiles (8:53 am ET): Marco, allow some levity. It’s going to be a long day. Meanwhile, I agree with JD. Our approach should be strategic.
Witkoff (9:00 am ET): We need a plan that ensures our interests align with those of Israel but also keeps Don happy.
Kent (9:05 am ET): Maybe we can leverage our tech support for their defense systems? Gives us an edge and keeps them on our side.
Ratcliffe (9:10 am ET): Good point, Joe. Tech has always been an ace up our sleeve.
Bessent (9:15 am ET): The key is to play our cards right and not tip our hand too early. Keep Israel close, but Europe closer.
Hegseth (9:25 am ET): Scott, that sounds like a quote from “The Godfather”… mixing business with pleasure, eh? 😎
Vance (9:35 am ET): Pete, you’re thinking of “keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.” Not entirely irrelevant here though.
Rubio (9:45 am ET): Moving on, let’s outline some actionable items and prepare for a briefing. And Tulsi, you can have your borscht if it makes you happy.
Gabbard (9:50 am ET): You’re the best, Marco ☺️. Let’s keep those special relations going!
