NASA Confirms

In an announcement that has thrown the scientific community into a state of unparalleled bewilderment, NASA has officially confirmed today that the moon is, in fact, a large spherical prop left behind by an ancient alien civilization fond of theatrical performances.
The unexpected revelation came during a press conference held by NASA Administrator, Bill Nelson who solemnly declared, “After years of intense lunar investigations and multiple moon landings, we can confirm that the moon, our beloved satellite, is indeed a discarded prop from an advanced alien civilization’s intergalactic theatre production.”
This groundbreaking discovery was apparently made when a team of astronauts, on a routine lunar expedition, stumbled upon what can only be described as an ‘Alien Prop Manager’s Notebook.’ The notebook, made from an otherworldly metallic material, contained elaborate sketches of the moon along with meticulous notes written in what researchers have now identified as a form of alien shorthand. The notes detailed the moon’s construction, suggesting it was part of an epic space opera that ran for several millennia in the Andromeda Galaxy.

Among the fascinating revelations was the fact that the moon was meant to serve as a backdrop for the dramatic climax of the opera, in which the hero battles space dragons while singing an aria about existential dread. The moon’s crater-ridden surface, long believed to be the result of meteor impacts, was discovered to be the result of a special effect gone awry during the dragon battle sequence.
After years of intense lunar investigations and multiple moon landings, we can confirm that the moon, our beloved satellite, is indeed a discarded prop from an advanced alien civilization's intergalactic theatre production.
But perhaps the most shocking revelation of all was the assertion that the moon was left behind deliberately. “Based on our translation of the notebook, it appears that the alien theatrical troupe had to jettison the moon prop due to a dispute with their unionized workforce, who complained of the moon’s unwieldy size,” said Dr. Mathilda Jensen, a senior NASA astrophysicist. “It seems the aliens simply chose to abandon it in our solar system and went on to create a new, more manageable moon prop for their next production.”

These revelations have sent waves of shock and disbelief through both the scientific community and the public. The moon, the subject of countless poems, songs, and scientific inquiries, is really just a discarded stage prop, a remnant of an ancient civilization’s passion for dramaturgy.
The press conference ended with a flurry of questions from stunned journalists, leaving the crowd in a state of anticipatory hush as they await further clarifications on this bewildering discovery. What happens next for NASA and its lunar missions? Only time will tell…
The transition from unmitigated scientific curiosity to a surreal sense of disbelief was swift at the press conference. As the news spread worldwide, the public reaction ranged from stunned silence to speculative frenzy. Internet theorists who had always maintained that the moon landing was a hoax, now find themselves in a conundrum, having to defend the existence of the moon itself.

The moon, the subject of countless poems, songs, and scientific inquiries, is really just a discarded stage prop, a remnant of an ancient civilization's passion for dramaturgy.
In a rather unexpected twist, the moon’s newfound theatrical history has piqued the interest of Hollywood, with several high-profile producers already vying for the movie rights to the lunar prop’s dramatic saga. “The moon’s tale has all the elements of a blockbuster,” said acclaimed producer, Max Silverstein. “Existential alien operas, space dragons, union disputes - it’s ‘Interstellar’ meets ‘La La Land’, with a dash of ‘Norma Rae’. We couldn’t ask for a better pitch.”
Meanwhile, scientists are grappling with a plethora of questions. If the moon was actually designed as a dramatic prop, what does that mean for earth’s tidal systems, which are influenced by the moon’s gravitational pull? What implications does this have for the solar system, and indeed the very fabric of astrophysics?

Astrophysicist Dr. Otto Schmidt explained, “We may need to rethink some of our fundamental assumptions. For instance, lunar prop or not, the moon has been integral to Earth’s stability. The moon’s gravitational effect on the Earth’s tides is a scientific fact. So, we’re dealing with a prop that has real, measurable influences on our planet. That’s not just theatre – it’s interactive theatre on a cosmic scale.”
There are also concerns over the potential cultural implications of this revelation. A vast number of religious, mythological and cultural narratives are based on the moon. Responding to such concerns, leading sociologist Dr. Naomi Greenberg said, “Our cultural connections to the moon run deep. But this new context doesn’t diminish its significance. If anything, it enriches it. We can now appreciate the moon not only as a celestial body but also as a testament to the cosmic drama of life.”
As the world grapples with this astounding revelation, NASA has announced a follow-up mission to the moon to conduct a thorough examination of the prop, promising to keep the public updated on the progress. While the announcement may have initially left humanity feeling like the unwitting audience of an alien opera, there is now a growing sense of excitement. The moon, it seems, continues to be a source of mystery and fascination – a celestial stage prop that has stolen the spotlight.

In the words of NASA Administrator, Bill Nelson, “The show, it seems, must go on.”