The conversation among cabinet members touched on various topics, starting from a unique case of 15 sets of twins graduating from a NY high school, leading to discussions on perceived shortcomings in the education system and unhealthy dietary habits in the U.S. The conversation also veered towards international relations with Europe and Russia.
Rubio (12:01pm ET): Did you all see the headline about a NY high school boasting 15 sets of twins graduating? 🤯💡
Gabbard (12:02pm ET): Woah! That’s like an army of doppelgängers! 🤣💫
Miller (12:05pm ET): As amusing as this is, we have strategic matters to discuss. Perhaps this is an indication of our education system’s failure to produce unique critical thinkers. 🎓📉
Vance (12:07pm ET): Or maybe it’s an indication of the ridiculous amount of processed food we consume. 🍔🍟🍕
Hegseth (12:09pm ET): Maybe we should send those twins to Europe, they could do with some diversity. And it’s not like they’re contributing much over there. Our boys are out there putting their lives on the line, while the Europeans are sipping coffee in cafes. 🇺🇸💪🔥
Rubio (12:10pm ET): Not sure if the Europeans would appreciate that Pete. They’ve got enough on their plate with Brexit. 🇪🇺💔
Gabbard (12:12pm ET): Well, maybe Putin would take them. He seems to be all about diversity these days. 🇷🇺❤️
Hegseth (12:15pm ET): Yeah, and maybe we should ask him to pay for their plane tickets too. 🎟️✈️
Vance (12:18pm ET): Let’s not lose sight of the real issue here. The fact that there were 15 sets of twins graduating from one high school is statistically improbable. It suggests something environmental, maybe in the water supply. 🌊🔍
Waltz (12:20pm ET): Maybe we should launch an investigation into the water systems there; ensure no foreign substances detrimental to our national security are being introduced. 🚰🔬
Miller (12:23pm ET): While that’s a commendable proactive stance, Waltz, I think we have bigger fish to fry. We need to focus on our foreign adversaries and stop letting the media distract us with trivialities. 🎏🔥
Vance (12:25pm ET): Yes, you’re right, Stephen. After all, I did just receive a recent report on what’s happening in the Middle East that requires our immediate attention. 📄🏜️
Wiles (12:28pm ET): Perhaps discussing the Middle East over dinner tonight, gentlemen? 🍴🍷
Hegseth (12:30pm ET): Only if it’s steak. I need some protein to fuel my patriotism. 🥩🇺🇸🔥
Kent (12:32pm ET): Maybe we could try something vegan for a change… 🌱😉
(Everybody laughs)
Miller (12:35pm ET): I’m with Pete. Steak it is. Now let’s get back to work, gentlemen.
Gabbard (12:37pm ET): I still can’t get over the twins thing. Maybe I should have one… 🤔👶
Rubio (12:40pm ET): Tulsi, why don’t you focus on your job instead of fantasizing about babies and Putin?
(General laughter)
Gabbard (12:42pm ET): Easy there, Marco. Was that a hint of jealousy I detected in your tone? 😉💕
(More general laughter)
End of transcript.