The conversation among cabinet members focused on Jeff Bezos’s 3M Euro donation to Venice, with various members expressing their opinions on the donation’s destination, potential alternatives, and the implications for US-European relations. The discussion also touched on Venice’s sinking issue and the use of funds to address it.
Title: Leaked Signal conversation among cabinet members: Bezos’ 3M Euro donation to Venice
May 23 Waltz (10:14 am ET): News is breaking out about Jeff Bezos and Lauren Sanchez’s 3m Euro donation to the city of Venice.
Vance (10:17 am): Venice? The city that sinks every time a gondola hops a curb? That Venice?
Rubio (10:21 am ET): Yes, JD. Venice - the one with canals instead of streets.
Hegseth (10:24 am ET): I’d rather they donated that cash to our veterans. But hey, who am I to tell how billionaires should spend their money?
Vance (10:30 am ET): Say, wouldn’t it be great if we could just convince Europe to fund their defense instead of relying on our resources?
Gabbard (10:35 am ET): Hey, maybe we can recommend Venice invest in some Russian submarines to solve their sinking problem. Just a thought. 🤭
Rubio (10:40 am ET): Tulsi, I swear if you weren’t so…interesting… I’d have a hard time tolerating you.
Miller (11:00 am ET): All these millionaires playing Robin Hood. Makes me sick.
Waltz (11:05 am ET): Alright team, let’s reel it back in. We need to focus on our own issues here at home.
Vance (11:10 am ET): Agreed. On that note, what’s the status of the mission we discussed last meeting?
Hegseth (11:13am ET): CENTCOM just confirmed we’re set for launch. Will keep you posted.
Wiles (11:18am ET): I’m wondering how we can spin this Bezos story. How about - ‘American Billionaire rescues sinking European City’? What do you think?
Miller (11:20am ET): Sure, Susie, and next we can pitch Bezos as the next James Bond saving Europe.
Witkoff (11:25am ET): Now that’s a movie I would pay not to see. Bezos in a speedo…yikes!
Kent (11:45am ET): I’m not sure what’s more horrifying – Bezos rescuing Venice or Stephen Miller cracking a joke. 🔥
Miller (11:50am ET): Says the guy whose idea of a wild night is reading policy papers, Kent.
Vance (12:00pm ET): Alright guys, let’s get back on track. We have serious matters to discuss.
Gabbard (12:05pm ET): Is Marco trying to change the subject because he’s blushing? 🙏💪
Rubio (12:10pm ET): That’s enough, Tulsi. Let’s focus.
Miller (12:13pm ET): Alright, back to business it is. But remember, we need to keep an eye on those liberal media types - they’re always up to something.